#tensionswerehigh

Hey, it’s Kristin!

Sidebar: HI MOM AND POPS!! Miss you all and love you more!

Well, day 7 is officially winding down and I hope I don’t pass out before I’m done with this.

Man, what didn’t happen today…attacks from the enemy; missing hot dog buns, late classes. Nothing is off limits when you’re getting ready to teach 60 high school students. After such an emotional send off with the OVC kids yesterday and a breathtaking day exploring Cape Town, the enemy had found his perfect opportunity to strike. It was evident this morning that those amazing moments that leave us breathless are the ones the enemy craves to bring to a crashing halt.

Lets start from the beginning…we’ve all had those days where we wake up on the wrong side of the bed, but we usually turn it around after our first cup of coffee. Today was not that day; at least not for me. I don’t even think a Venti Americano with 5 shots of espresso could have turned my morning around. It was like I was the anti-Minions in Despicable Me 2 and no one was safe (sorry, had lots of time to watch movies on the plane ride). It was such an unnatural feeling; a feeling of heaviness weighing me down. I knew I had the choice to turn my morning around, but it felt miles away and unattainable. Self-doubt and unworthiness flooded me. I cried out to God and heard no answer. I was suffocating and the enemy was the one tightening the noose.

The best thing about these mission trips is that you’re blessed with 14 new best friends; people who are frequently going through the same emotions and roller coasters that you are. Luckily, some of those people happen to be a little smarter and a little more experienced than you are. Take Erin for example, a.k.a. my travel buddy, she’s just a couple years older than me, but could run circles around me with her knowledge and love. We’ve had an awesome opportunity to bond over the last year and build a genuine friendship. So much so, that she has decided to adopt me; Ryan is thrilled. Then there’s Monica, our fearless slash overly competitive leader, who God designed for loving on these kids and us. Any who, I got to see these friendships step up today when they both individually took me aside and broke down my walls.

I don’t know how many of you have had the pleasure of participating in a mission trip overseas, but it has been made clear that we all build up these expectations of what we are going to experience. I had a full year to build up hope and excitement, so when I stepped off the plane and I didn’t have that, “OMG, I’m totally in Africa” moment, I was totally bummed! I had built up this idea that I would get here and the heavens would open; angels would sing and I would have direction for the rest of my life. That was soooo not the case.

Let’s get back to today. Long story semi-short, I felt like I was missing something and that I wasn’t sure where I fit in. After my convos with Erin and Monica, I was reassured that all of us were chosen for this team and those reasons were starting to peak through. With their help, I realized that the “aha” moment I thought I was missing was due to the fact that I already spend a ton of time with youth back home; this kind of thing is just natural to me.

After regrouping, it became clear that I was not the only one under attack. The enemy knew how much of a high we were on and he was determined to bring us down. It was such a blessing when Adam could feel this presence and prayed over our group. It felt like an instant weight had been lifted and I could breathe again. When you come to places like this, you expect to encounter people dealing with these kinds of attacks, but you rarely expect that person to be you.

Following our impromptu prayer session, we were back on the right track and loving on everyone again. We spent the next few hours playing catch up and preparing for the academy kids to show up. With their arrival, we were excited to have brand new faces to love on. Let me tell you, these high schoolers are just as sassy as our OC kids…and I love it!! Although we could feel the enemy trying to find another gap in our community, like running out of hot dog buns, we pulled through and rocked our first day of classes! I’m so proud of our team and the way they led today. Many of them do not work with youth on a normal basis, so it was refreshing to see the success that came out of today.

We go into tomorrow tired, but stoked on what Christ has in store. We know that He is here with us and has this place engulfed in his love. My heart is full of joy when I think about the fact that we have a whole week left here. South Africa has stolen my heart and I’m so ok with giving it away.

Much Love,

Kristin 

Ps...I've come to realize that the key to a successful mission trip is nightly dance parties. 

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